Mowing the lawn with Hitler

The first time I met someone famous I also didn't know who they were.

Whilst waiting for a friend to finish a shift at a posh Perth hotel, I started up a conversation with someone carrying a musical instrument case. I was telling him all about the upcoming tour of the Americas with the Australian Youth Orchestra that I was involved in. People kept interrupting us to ask him for his autograph. "Are you famous?" I asked naively. "Oh I play with a band called Simply Red." "Never heard of it." "So where in the Americas is the orchestra performing?" he continued.

Whilst working in Verona, I ran into a Suzanne a wonderful friend whom I had met not too long before at the Innsbrucker Festspiele. This oboist invited me to visit her at her home near Innsbruck. As I was spending my last weeks before returning to Australia in Munich I jumped at the opportunity to visit Suzanne.

'Ich gehe Jägern!' Announced a Tirolian clad husband with shot gun folded over the crook of his arm. Going hunting? I asked myself. What's with the dress ups? I asked myself. Was he for real, or was this some kind of put on for the tourist? It was as corney as Crocodile Dundee. But he was perfectly serious and the beef bourgingon I'd been served up, was infact bambi bourgingon. He had gone deer hunting.

Suzanne's husband was apparently very famous and received much fan mail from Australia. I felt a little stupid as I had no idea who he was, he however seemed to like that I didn't know him. His humility reminded me of the Simply Red musician. He was currently playing the role of Hitler and had been studying his mannerisms and body language for many months. So not only had he a little moustache and a 1930s bowl cut he had the mannerisms of Hitler. Suzanne said she would often get a terrible fright when he entered her peripheral vision. I however had a terrific laugh when Hitler and I, beers in hand boarded the tractor and mowed the vast expanses of their farm lawn.

Fast way to heaven.

Just like in Islam, Baha'is observe a period of fasting. Nineteen days abstinence from food and water from sunrise to sunset. Travellers, nursing and expecting mothers, the ill and those employed in heavy labour are exempt.

Yesterday was the first day of my first fast (previously I had been too ill). On reflection of my day, I felt so overwhelmed by the spiritual power and the divine blessings I received throughout the day that I cried and cried. I actually felt a little frightened. I saw such clear evidence of god's love for me. It was frightening because this intangible and abstract concept is thoroughly pondered but the only evidence we have is faith. I imagine it is the type of fear one would feel on seeing a ghost. My tears were also tears of joy and tears of relief. I have never in my life felt that someone loved me. My parents were wonderful, but they were atheists and living with such hardship, they were olympians at detachment when it came to their kids. I felt really loved, cared for and safe yesterday.

At about 11am I started to feel hungry, so I figured I'd go and fill myself up with prayer, and it worked a treat. I didn't feel hungry anymore. I did suffer a dreadful thirst however. With this thirst came detachment, humility, compassion, gratitude, I was so happy, and that first drink of water at 6.51pm, how beautiful.

It has been suggested that discipline it a fasting requirement. I guess I had been very lucky here. I was unable to fast in my first two years of being a Baha'i as I was recovering from alcoholism and suffering Post Traumatic Stress Disorder after having worked in the Immigration Detention Centre on Christmas Island. I felt that I was missing out by not being able to fast. I was desperate for the grace that was appointed in the book that Baha’u'llah had mentioned. So I was relieved from the need for discipline.

Day two of the fast and I really feel very fatigued. I must stop, sit, lie and pray. I am so grateful for this. As I am currently in a mania phase of Bipolar, I am so happy to stop, just stop. This in itself is freedom and gives me fantastic perspective. Thank you.